C071. Brer Rabbit and the Mosquitoes

37. Brother Rabbit and the Mosquitoes. Text Source: Nights with Uncle Remus by Joel Chandler Harris. Online at Project Gutenberg. I have removed the frame material and standardized the spelling; click here for the original spelling plus all notes to the story.

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BRER RABBIT and the MOSQUITOES

There was one time when Brer Wolf live in the swamp, and, more than that, he had a mighty likely gal. Look like all the other critters was after her. They'd go down there to Brer Wolf house, they would, and they'd sit up and court the gal, and enjoy theyself.

It went on this a-way till after while the mosquitoes begun to get monstrous bad. Brer Fox, he went flying 'round Miss Wolf, and he sat there, he did, and run on with her and fight mosquitoes just as big as life and twice as natural. Last Brer Wolf, he took and caught Brer Fox slapping and fighting at he mosquitoes. With that he took and took Brer Fox by the off ear and led him out to the front gate, and when he get there, heallow, he did, that no man what can't put up with mosquitoes ain't going to come a-courting his gal.

Then Brer Coon, he come flying 'round the gal, but he ain't been there no time scarcely 'fore he begun to knock at the mosquitoes; and no sooner is he done this than Brer Wolf show him the door. Brer Mink, he come and try he hand, yet he pleased to fight the mosquitoes, and Brer Wolf ask him out.

It went on this a-way till by and by all the critters been flying 'round Brer Wolf's gal excepting it's old Brer Rabbit, and when he hear what kind of treatments the other critters been catching he allow to hisself that he believe in he soul he must go down to Brer Wolf house and set the gal out one whet if it's the last act.

No sooner say, no sooner do. Off he put, and it weren't long 'fore he find hisself knocking at Brer Wolf front door. Old Sis Wolf, she took and put down her knitting and she up and allow, she did, "Who dat?"

The gal, she was standing up 'fore the looking-glass sorter primping, and she choke back a giggle, she did, and allow, "Sh-h-h! My goodness, mammy! That's Mr. Rabbit. I hear the gals say he's a mighty proper and particular gentleman, and I just hope you ain't going to sit there and run on like you most always does when I got company 'bout how much soap-grease you done save up and how many kitten the old cat got. I gets right ashamed sometimes, that I does!"

Old Sis Wolf, she sat there, she did, and settle her cap on her head, and snicker, and look at the gal like she monstrous proud. The gal, she took and shook herself 'fore the looking-glass a time or two, and then she tipped to the door and open it little ways and peep out just like she scared someone going to hit her a clip side the head. There stood old Brer Rabbit looking just as slick as a race-horse. The gal, she took and laugh, she did, and holler, "Why Lord, ma! It's Mr. Rabbit, an' here we been afraid it was someone what ain't got no business 'round here!"

Old Sis Wolf she look over her specs, and snicker, and then she up and allow, "Well, don't keep him standin' out there all night. Ask him in, for goodness sake."

Then the gal, she took and drop her handkerchief, and Brer Rabbit, he dipped down and grab it and pass it to her with a bow, and the gal say she much obliged, 'cause that was more than Mr. Fox would've done, and then she ask Brer Rabbit how he come on, and Brer Rabbit allow he right pert, and then he ask her whereabouts her daddy, and old Sis Wolf allow she go find him.

It weren't long 'fore Brer Rabbit hear Brer Wolf stomping the mud off of he foots in the back porch, and then by and by in he come. They shook hands, they did, and Brer Rabbit say that when he go calling on he acquaintance, it ain't feel natural 'cepting the man of the house sitting 'round somewheres.

"If he don't talk none," says Brer Rabbit, says he, "he can just sit up 'gainst the chimney-jam an' keep time by noddin'."

But old Brer Wolf, he one of these here kind of mens what got the whimsies and he up and allow that he don't let hisself get to nodding front of company. They run on this a-way till by and by Brer Rabbit hear the mosquitoes come zooming 'round, and claiming kin with him. Course they claim kin with him. They claims kin with folks yet, let 'lone Brer Rabbit. Manys and manys the time when I hear 'em sailing 'round and singing out "Cousin! Cousin!" and I let you know, the mosquitoes is mighty close kin when they gets to be your cousin.

Brer Rabbit, he hear 'em zooming, and he know he got to do some mighty nice talking, so he up and ask for drink of water. The gal, she took and fetched it.

"Mighty nice water, Brer Wolf." (The mosquitoes they zoom.)

"Some say it too full of wiggletails, Brer Rabbit." (The mosquitoes, they zoom and they zoom.)

"Mighty nice place you got, Brer Wolf." (Mosquitoes they zoom.)

"Some say it too low in the swamp, Brer Rabbit." (Mosquitoes they zoom and they zoom.)

They zoom so bad that Brer Rabbit begun to get scared, and when that critter get scared, he mind work like one of these here flutter-mills. By and by, he allow, "Went to town the other day, and there I seed a sight what I never 'spected to see."

"What that, Brer Rabbit?"

"Spotted horse, Brer Wolf."

"No, Brer Rabbit!"

"I most surely seed him, Brer Wolf."

Brer Wolf, he scratch he head, and the gal she held up her hands and make great admiration about the spotted horse. (The mosquitoes they zoom, and they keep on zooming.) 

Brer Rabbit, he talk on, he did, "It weren't just one spotted horse, Brer Wolf, it was a whole team of spotted horses, and they went galloping-up horses," says he. 

(image source)

"Let alone that, Brer Wolf, my grandaddy was spotted," says Brer Rabbit, says he.

Gal, she squeal and holler out, "Why, Brer Rabbit! Ain't you ashamed yo'self for to be talkin' that a-way, an' about yo' own-alone blood kin too?"

"It's the naked truth I'm a-givin' you," says Brer Rabbit, says he. (Mosquito zoom and come closer.)

Brer Wolf allow, "Well—well—well!"

Old Sis Wolf, she allow, "To be surely, to be surely!" (Mosquito zoom and come nigher and nigher.) 

Brer Rabbit allow, "Yessir! Just as sure as you are sitting there, my grandaddy was spotted. Spotted all over." (Mosquito come zooming up and light on Brer Rabbit jaw.) 

"He was that. He had a great big spot right here!" [storyteller slaps]

(image source)

No sooner is he do this than another mosquito come zooming 'round and light on Brer Rabbit leg. Brer Rabbit, he talk, and he talk, "Poor old grandaddy! I bound he make you laugh, he look so funny with all them spots and speckles. He had spot on the side of the head, where I done show you, and then he had another big spot right here on the leg," says he. [storyteller slaps]

Mosquito zoom and light 'twixt Brer Rabbit shoulder-blades. 

Then he talk, "Believe me or not believe me if you mind to, but my grandaddy had a big black spot up here on he back which look like saddle-mark."

Blip! Brer Rabbit took hisself on the back!

Mosquito sail 'round and zoom and light down here upon the hip-bone. He say he grandaddy got spot down there.

Blip! He took hisself upon the hip-bone.

It keep on this a-way, till by and by old Brer Wolf and old Sis Wolf they listen at Brer Rabbit till they begun to nod, and then old Brer Rabbit and the gal they sat up there and kill mosquitoes right along.

(image source)

I hear talk that Brer Wolf sent Brer Rabbit word next day that he can get the gal by going after her, but I ain't never hear talk about Brer Rabbit going. The day aftewards was mighty long time, and by then Brer Rabbit might've had some other project on hand.

C071. Baer (p. 85). Brother Rabbit and the Mosquitoes

This is Chase071.

Types 1565 agreement not to scratch
Motifs K0263 agreement not to scratch
H1184 task: cutting down tree without scratching for stinging insects

Notes
Harris notes the importance of the storyteller acting it out.
Gerber has a Woloff tale with monkey scratching his old war wounds
Both Flowers and Dasent have an Anansi version

Baer: "All the evidence points to an African source for this Afro-American version"

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MY NOTES

She does not mention the weirdly botched version in Owen.

C071. Brer Rabbit and the Mosquitoes (original spelling)

37. Brother Rabbit and the Mosquitoes. Text Source: Nights with Uncle Remus by Joel Chandler Harris. Online at Project Gutenberg. You can click here for the standardized spelling plus all notes to the story.

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BRER RABBIT and the MOSQUITOES

The next night Daddy Jack was still away when the little boy went to see Uncle Remus, and the child asked about him.

"Bless yo' soul, honey! don't ax me 'bout Brer Jack. He look lak he mighty ole en trimbly, but he mighty peart nigger, mon. He look lak he shufflin' 'long, but dat ole nigger gits over groun', sho'. Forty year ergo, maybe I mought er kep' up wid 'im, but I let you know Brer Jack is away 'head er me. He mos' sho'ly is."

"Why, he's older than you are, Uncle Remus!" the child exclaimed.

"Dat w'at I year tell. Seem lak hit mighty kuse, but [215]sho' ez youer bawn Brer Jack is a heap mo' pearter nigger dan w'at ole Remus is. He little, yit he mighty hard. Dat 's Brer Jack, up en down."

Uncle Remus paused and reflected a moment. Then he went on:

"Talkin' 'bout Brer Jack put me in min' 'bout a tale w'ich she sho'ly mus' er happen down dar in dat ar country whar Brer Jack come fum, en it sorter ketch me in de neighborhoods er de 'stonishment 'kaze he aint done up'n tell it. I 'speck it done wuk loose fum Brer Jack 'membunce."

"What tale was that, Uncle Remus?"

"Seem lak dat one time w'en eve'ything en eve'ybody was runnin' 'long des lak dey bin had waggin grease 'pun um, ole Brer Wolf"—

The little boy laughed incredulously and Uncle Remus paused and frowned heavily.

"Why, Uncle Remus! how did Brother Wolf get away from Mammy-Bammy Big-Money?"

The old man's frown deepened and his voice was full of anger as he replied:

"Now, den, is I'm de tale, er is de tale me? Tell me dat! Is I'm de tale, er is de tale me? Well, den, ef I aint de tale en de tale aint me, den how come you wanter take'n rake me over de coals fer?"

"Well, Uncle Remus, you know what you said. You said that was the end of Brother Wolf."

"I bleedz ter 'spute dat," exclaimed Uncle Remus, with the air of one performing a painful duty; "I bleedz [216]ter 'spute it. Dat w'at de tale say. Ole Remus is one nigger en de tale, hit 's a n'er nigger. Yit I aint got no time fer ter set back yer en fetch out de oggyments."

Here the old man paused, closed his eyes, leaned back in his chair, and sighed. After a while he said, in a gentle tone:

"So den, Brer Wolf done dead, en yer I wuz runnin' on des same lak he wuz done 'live. Well! well! well!"

Uncle Remus stole a glance at the little boy, and immediately relented.

"Yit," he went on, "ef I'm aint de tale en de tale aint me, hit aint skacely make no diffunce whe'er Brer Wolf dead er whe'er he's a high-primin' 'roun' bodder'n 'longer de yuther creeturs. Dead er no dead, dey wuz one time w'en Brer Wolf live in de swamp down dar in dat ar country whar Brer Jack come fum, en, mo'n dat, he had a mighty likely gal. Look lak all de yuther creeturs wuz atter 'er. Dey 'ud go down dar ter Brer Wolf house, dey would, en dey 'ud set up en court de gal, en 'joy deyse'f.

"Hit went on dis a-way twel atter w'ile de skeeters 'gun ter git monst'us bad. Brer Fox, he went flyin' 'roun' Miss Wolf, en he sot dar, he did, en run on wid 'er en fight skeeters des es big ez life en twice-t ez natchul. Las' Brer Wolf, he tuck'n kotch Brer Fox slappin' en fightin' at he skeeters. Wid dat he tuck'n tuck Brer Fox by de off year en led 'im out ter de front gate, en w'en he git dar, he 'low, he did, dat no man w'at can't put up wid skeeters aint gwine ter come a-courtin' his gal.

[217]"Den Brer Coon, he come flyin' 'roun' de gal, but he aint bin dar no time skacely 'fo' he 'gun ter knock at de skeeters; en no sooner is he done dis dan Brer Wolf show 'im de do'. Brer Mink, he come en try he han', yit he bleedz ter fight de skeeters, en Brer Wolf ax 'im out.

"Hit went on dis a-way twel bimeby all de creeturs bin flyin' 'roun' Brer Wolf's gal 'ceppin' it's ole Brer Rabbit, en w'en he year w'at kinder treatments de yuther creeturs bin ketchin' he 'low ter hisse'f dat he b'leeve in he soul he mus' go down ter Brer Wolf house en set de gal out one whet ef it's de las' ack.

"No sooner say, no sooner do. Off he put, en 't wa'n't long 'fo' he fine hisse'f knockin' at Brer Wolf front do'. Ole Sis Wolf, she tuck'n put down 'er knittin' en she up'n low, she did:

"'Who dat?'

"De gal, she 'uz stannin' up 'fo' de lookin'-glass sorter primpin', en she choke back a giggle, she did, en 'low:

"'Sh-h-h! My goodness, mammy! dat 's Mr. Rabbit. I year de gals say he's a mighty prop-en-tickler[*Proper and particular.] gentermun, en I des hope you aint gwine ter set dar en run on lak you mos' allers does w'en I got comp'ny 'bout how much soap-grease you done save up en how many kitten de ole cat got. I gits right 'shame' sometimes, dat I does!'"

The little boy looked astonished.

"Did she talk that way to her mamma?" he asked.

"Shoo, chile! 'Mungs' all de creeturs dey aint no mo' [218]kuse creeturs dan de gals. Ole ez I is, ef I wuz ter start in dis minnit fer ter tell you how kuse de gals is, en de Lord wuz ter spar' me plum twel I git done, yo' head 'ud be gray, en Remus 'ud be des twice-t ez ole ez w'at he is right now."

"Well, what did her mamma say, Uncle Remus?"

"Ole Sis Wolf, she sot dar, she did, en settle 'er cap on 'er head, en snicker, en look at de gal lak she monst'us proud. De gal, she tuck'n shuck 'erse'f 'fo' de lookin'-glass a time er two, en den she tipt ter de do' en open' it little ways en peep out des lak she skeer'd some un gwine ter hit 'er a clip side de head. Dar stood ole Brer Rabbit lookin' des ez slick ez a race-hoss. De gal, she tuck'n laff, she did, en holler:

"'W'y law, maw! hit 's Mr. Rabbit, en yer we bin 'fraid it 'uz some 'un w'at aint got no business 'roun' yer!'

"Ole Sis Wolf she look over 'er specks, en snicker, en den she up'n 'low:

"'Well, don't keep 'im stannin' out dar all night. Ax 'im in, fer goodness sake.'

"Den de gal, she tuck'n drap 'er hankcher, en Brer Rabbit, he dipt down en grab it en pass it ter 'er wid a bow, en de gal say she much 'blige, 'kaze dat 'uz mo' den Mr. Fox 'ud er done, en den she ax Brer Rabbit how he come on, en Brer Rabbit 'low he right peart, en den he ax 'er wharbouts 'er daddy, en ole Sis Wolf 'low she go fine 'im.

"'T wa'n't long 'fo' Brer Rabbit year Brer Wolf stompin' [219]de mud off'n he foots in de back po'ch, en den bimeby in he come. Dey shuck han's, dey did, en Brer Rabbit say dat w'en he go callin' on he 'quaintunce, hit aint feel natchul 'ceppin' de man er de house settin' 'roun' some'rs.

"'Ef he don't talk none,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee, 'he kin des set up ag'in' de chimbly-jam en keep time by noddin'.'

"But ole Brer Wolf, he one er deze yer kinder mens w'at got de whimzies,[*In these latter days a man with the whimzies, or whimsies, is known simply as a crank.] en he up'n 'low dat he don't let hisse'f git ter noddin' front er comp'ny. Dey run on dis a-way twel bimeby Brer Rabbit year de skeeters come zoonin' 'roun', en claimin' kin wid 'im."

The little boy laughed; but Uncle Remus was very serious.

"Co'se dey claim kin wid 'im. Dey claims kin wid folks yit, let 'lone Brer Rabbit. Manys en manys de time w'en I year um sailin' 'roun' en singin' out 'Cousin! Cousin!' en I let you know, honey, de skeeters is mighty close kin w'en dey gits ter be yo' cousin.

"Brer Rabbit, he year um zoonin'," the old man continued, "en he know he got ter do some mighty nice talkin', so he up'n ax fer drink er water. De gal, she tuck'n fotch it.

"'Mighty nice water, Brer Wolf.' (De skeeters dey zoon.)[42]

[220]"'Some say it too full er wiggletails,[*Is it necessary to say that the wiggletail is the embryo mosquito?] Brer Rabbit.' (De skeeters, dey zoon en dey zoon.)

"'Mighty nice place you got, Brer Wolf.' (Skeeters dey zoon.)

"'Some say it too low in de swamp, Brer Rabbit.' (Skeeters dey zoon en dey zoon.)

"Dey zoon so bad," said Uncle Remus, drawing a long breath, "dat Brer Rabbit 'gun ter git skeer'd, en w'en dat creetur git skeer'd, he min' wuk lak one er deze yer flutter-mills. Bimeby, he 'low:

"'Went ter town t'er day, en dar I seed a sight w'at I never 'speckted ter see.'

"'W'at dat, Brer Rabbit?'

"'Spotted hoss, Brer Wolf.'

"'No, Brer Rabbit!'

"'I mos' sho'ly seed 'im, Brer Wolf.'

"Brer Wolf, he scratch he head, en de gal she hilt up 'er han's en make great 'miration 'bout de spotted hoss. (De skeeters dey zoon, en dey keep on zoonin'.) Brer Rabbit, he talk on, he did:

"''T wa'n't des one spotted hoss, Brer Wolf, 't wuz a whole team er spotted hosses, en dey went gallin'-up[* Galloping] hosses,' sezee. 'Let 'lone dat, Brer Wolf, my grandaddy wuz spotted,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee.

"Gal, she squeal en holler out:

"'W'y, Brer Rabbit! aint you 'shame' yo'se'f fer ter be talkin' dat a-way, en 'bout yo' own-'lone blood kin too?'

[221]"'Hit 's de naked trufe I'm a-ginin'[45] un you,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. (Skeeter zoon en come closeter.)

"Brer Wolf 'low 'Well—well—well!' Ole Sis Wolf, she 'low 'Tooby sho'ly, tooby sho'ly!' (Skeeter zoon en come nigher en nigher.) Brer Rabbit 'low:

"'Yasser! Des ez sho' ez youer settin' dar, my grandaddy wuz spotted. Spotted all over. (Skeeter come zoonin' up en light on Brer Rabbit jaw.) He wuz dat. He had er great big spot right yer!'"

Here Uncle Remus raised his hand and struck himself a resounding slap on the side of the face where the mosquito was supposed to be, and continued:

"No sooner is he do dis dan ne'r skeeter come zoonin' 'roun' en light on Brer Rabbit leg. Brer Rabbit, he talk, en he talk:

"'Po' ole grandaddy! I boun' he make you laff, he look so funny wid all dem spots en speckles. He had spot on de side er de head, whar I done show you, en den he had n'er big spot right yer on de leg,' sezee."

Uncle Remus slapped himself on the leg below the knee, and was apparently so serious about it that the little boy laughed loudly. The old man went on:

"Skeeter zoon en light 'twix' Brer Rabbit shoulder-blades. Den he talk:

"'B'leeve me er not b'leeve me ef you min' to, but my grandaddy had a big black spot up yer on he back w'ich look lak saddle-mark.'

"Blip Brer Rabbit tuck hisse'f on de back!

[222]"Skeeter sail 'roun' en zoon en light down yer beyan de hip-bone. He say he grandaddy got spot down dar.

"Blip he tuck hisse'f beyan de hip-bone.

"Hit keep on dis a-way," continued Uncle Remus, who had given vigorous illustrations of Brer Rabbit's method of killing mosquitoes while pretending to tell a story, "twel bimeby ole Brer Wolf en ole Sis Wolf dey lissen at Brer Rabbit twel dey 'gun ter nod, en den ole Brer Rabbit en de gal dey sot up dar en kill skeeters right erlong."

"Did he marry Brother Wolf's daughter?" asked the little boy.

"I year talk," replied Uncle Remus, "dat Brer Wolf sont Brer Rabbit wud nex' day dat he kin git de gal by gwine atter 'er, but I aint never year talk 'bout Brer Rabbit gwine. De day atterwuds wuz mighty long time, en by den Brer Rabbit moughter had some yuther projick on han'."[46]