C158. Brer Rabbit and the Gizzard-eater

15. Brother Rabbit and the Gizzard-eater. Text Source: Told by Uncle Remus by Joel Chandler Harris. Online at Project Gutenberg. I have removed the frame material and standardized the spelling; click here for the original spelling plus all notes to the story.

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BRER RABBIT and the GIZZARD-EATER

Ever since I been pirooting round in these low-grounds, it's been the talk of them what knowed that Brer Rabbit was a mighty man at a frolic. I don't expect he'd show up much in these days, but in the times when the critters was bossing their own jobs, Brer Rabbit was up for pretty nigh everything that was going on if there want too much work in it. There couldn't be a dance or a quilting nowhere's around but what he'd be there; he was first to come and last to go.

Well, there was one time when he went too far and stayed too late, because a big rain come enduring the time when they was playing and dancing, and when Brer Rabbit put out for home, he found that a big freshet done come and gone. The drains had got to be creeks, the creeks had got to be rivers, and the rivers—well, I ain't going to tell you what the rivers was 'cause you'd think that I done told the truth good-bye. By making big jumps and going out of his way, Brer Rabbit manage for to get as close to home as the creek, but when he get there, the creek was so wide that it make him feel like he been lost so long that his family done forgot him. Many and many a time had he crossed that creek on a log, but the log done gone, and the water was spread out all over creation. The water was wide, but that weren't more than half—it look like it was the wettest water that Brer Rabbit ever lay eyes on.

There was a ferry there for times like this, but it look like it was a bigger fresh than what they had counted on. Brer Rabbit, he sat on the bank and wipe the damp out of his face and eyes, and then he hollered for the man what run the ferry. 

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He hollered and hollered, and by and by, he hear someone answer him, and he looked a little closer, and there was the man, which his name was Jerry, way up in the top limbs of a tree; and he looked still closer, and he seed that Jerry had company, 'cause there was old Brer Bear sitting at the foot of the tree, waiting for Jerry for to come down so he can tell him howdy.

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Well, sir, Brer Rabbit took notice that there was something more than dampness 'twixt 'em, and he start in to holler again, and he hollered so loud, and he hollered so long, that he woke up old Brer Alligator. Now, it ain't make old Brer Alligator feel good for to be wokened up at that hour, 'cause he'd just had a nice supper of pine-knots and sweet taters, and he was laying out at full length on his mud bed. 

He allow to hisself, he did, "Who in the nation is this trying for to holler the bottom out of the creek?" He listen, and then he turn over and listen again. He shut one eye, and then he shut the other one, but there ain't no sleeping in that neighborhood. 

Jerry in the tree, he holler back, "Can't come—got company!"

Brer Alligator, he hear this, and he say to hisself that if nobody can't come, he can, and he riz to the top with no more fuss than a feather-bed makes when you let it alone. He riz, he did, and his two eyes look just perexactly like two bullets floating on the water. He riz and wunk his eye, and ask Brer Rabbit howdy, and more specially how is his daughter. 

Brer Rabbit, he say that there ain't no telling how his daughter is, 'cause when he left home her head was a-swelling. He say that some of the neighbors' chillun come by and flung rocks at her and one of 'em it her on top of the head right where the cow-lick is, and he had to run after the doctor.

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Brer Alligator allow, "You don't tell me, Brer Rabbit, that it's come to this! Your chillun getting chunked by your neighbors' chillun! Well, well, well! I wish you'd tell me whereabouts it's all a-going to end at. Why, it'll get so after while that there ain't no peace anywhere's excepting at my house in the bed of the creek."

Brer Rabbit say, "Ain't it the truth? And not only does Brer Fox chillun chunk my chillun on their cow-licks, but no sooner is I gone after the doctor than here come the creek a-rising. I may be wrong, but I ain't scared to say that it beats anything I ever is lay eyes on. Over yonder in the far woods is what my daughter is laying with the headache, and here's her pa, and 'twixt us is the boiling creek. If I was to try to wade, ten to one the water would be over my head, and if not that bad, all the pills what the doctor give me would melt in my pocket. And they might poison me, 'cause the doctor ain't say they was to be took outside."

Old Brer Alligator float on the water like he ain't weigh no more than one of these here postage stamps, and he try to drop a tear. He groan, he did, and float backwards and forwards like a tired canoe. He say, "Brer Rabbit, if theyre ever was a rover you is one. Up you come and off you go, and there ain't no more keeping up with you than if you had wings. If you think you can stay in one place long enough, I'll try to put you 'cross the creek."

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Brer Rabbit kind of rub his chin whiles he wiggle his nose. He allow, says he, "Brer Gator, how deep is that water what you floating in?"

Brer Alligator say, says he, "Brer Rabbit, if me and my old woman was to join heads, and I was to stand on the tip-end my tail, they'll still be room enough for all of my chillun 'fore we touch bottom."

Brer Rabbit, he fell back like he going to faint. He allow, "Brer Gator, you don't tell me! You surely don't mean them last words! Why, you make me feel like I'm further from home and them what's done lost for good! How the name of goodness you going to put me 'cross this slippery water?"

Brer Alligator, he blow a bubble or two out of his nose, and then he say, says he, "If you can stay still in one place long enough, I'm going to take you across on my back. You needn't to say thanky, yet I want you to know that I ain't everybody's water-horse."

Brer Rabbit he allow, says he, "I can well believe that, Brer Gator, but somehow, I kind of got a notion that your tail mighty limber. I hear old folks say that you can knock a chip from the back of you head with the tip-end of your tail and never half try."

Brer Alligator smack his mouth, and say, says he, "Limber my tail may be, Brer Rabbit, and far-reaching, but don't blame me. It was that a-way when it was begiven to me. It's all jointed up according to nature."

Brer Rabbit, he study and study, and the more he study, the worse he like it. But he pleased to go home—there weren't no two ways about that—and he allow, says he, "I expect what you say is somewheres in the neighborhoods of the truth, Brer Gator, and more than that, I believe I'll go along with you. If you'll ride up a little closer, I'll make up my mind so I won't keep you waiting."

Brer Alligator, he float by the side of the bank same as a cork out of a pickle bottle. He ain't do like he in a hurry, 'cause he dropped a word or two about the weather, and he say that the water was mighty cold down there in the slushes. But Brer Rabbit took notice that when he smiled one of his smiles, he showed up a double row of tooths, that look like they'd do mighty good work in a saw-mill. 

Brer Rabbit, he begun to shake like he having a chill; he allow, "I feel that damp, Brer Gator, that I might just as well be in water up to my chin!"

Brer Alligator ain't say nothing, but he can't hide his tooths. Brer Rabbit look up, he look down, and he look all around. He ain't scarcely know what to do. He allow, "Brer Gator, you back mighty roughening; how I going to ride on it?"

Brer Alligator say, says he, "The roughening will help you to hold on, 'cause you'll have to ride straddle. You can just fit you foots on the bumps and kind of brace yourself when you think you see a log floating at us. You can just sit up there same as if you was sitting at home in you rocking-chair."

Brer Rabbit shook his head, but he got on, he did, and he ain't no sooner get on than he wish mighty hard he was off. Brer Alligator say, says he. "You can pant if you want to, Brer Rabbit, but I'll do the paddling," and then he slip through the water just like he greased. 

Brer Rabbit sure was scared but he keep his eye open, and by and by he took notice that Brer Alligator weren't making for the place where the landing's at, and he up and say so. He allow, "Brer Gator, if I ain't mighty much mistooken, you ain't heading for the landing."

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Brer Alligator say, says he, "You sure is got mighty good eyes, Brer Rabbit. I been waiting for you a long time, and I'm the worst kind of waiter. I most know you ain't forget that day in the stubble, when you say you going to show me old man Trouble. Well, you ain't only show him to me, but you made me shake hands with him. You set the dry grass afire, and burn me scandalous. That the reason my back so rough, and that the reason my hide so tough. Well, I been a-waiting since that time, and now here you is. You burn me till I had to squench the burning in the big quagmire."

Brer Alligator laugh, but he had the laugh all on his side, 'cause that was one of the times when Brer Rabbit ain't feel like giggling. He sat there a-shaking and a-shivering. By and by he allow, says he, "What you gonna do, Brer Gator?"

Brer Alligator, say, says he, "It look like to me that since you set the dry grass afire, I been having symptoms. That what the doctor say. He look at my tongue, and feel of my pulse, and shake his head. He say that beings he's my friend, he don't mind telling me that my symptoms is getting more worser than what they been, and if I don't take something I'll be falling into one these here inclines what make folks flabby and weak."

Brer Rabbit, he shook and he shiver'd. He allow, says he, "What else the doctor say, Brer Gator?"

Brer Alligator keep on a-slipping along; he say, says he, "The doctor ain't only look at my tongue—he measured my breath, and he hit me on my bosom—tip-tap-tap!—and he say there ain't but one thing that'll cure me. I ask him what that is, and he say it's Rabbit gizzard."

Brer Alligator slip and slide along, and wait for to see what Brer Rabbit going to say to that. He ain't had to wait long, 'cause Brer Rabbit done his thinking like one of these here machines what got lightning in it. He allow, says he, "It's a mighty good thing you struck up with me this day, Brer Gator, 'cause I got just perexactly the kind of physic what you looking for. All the neighbors say I'm mighty queer and I expect I is, but queer or not queer, I'm long been looking for the gizzard-eater."

Brer Alligator ain't say nothing; he just slide through the water, and listen to what Brer Rabbit saying. 

Brer Rabbit allow, says he, "The last time I was tooken sick, the doctor come in a hurry, and he sat up with me all night—not a wink of sleep did that man get. He say he can tell by the way I was going on, rolling and tossing, and moaning and groaning, that there weren't no physic going to do me no good. I ain't never see no doctor scratch his head like that doctor did; he done like he was stumped, he sure did. He say he ain't never see nobody with my kind of trouble, and he went off and call in one of his brother doctors, and the two knock their heads together, and say my trouble all come from having a double gizzard. When my old woman hear that, she just flung her apron over her head, and fell back in a dead faint, and a little more and I'd've had to pay a doctor bill on her accounts. When she squalled, some of my chillun got scared and took to the woods, and they ain't all got back when I left home last night."

Brer Alligator, he just went a-slipping long through the water; he listen, but he ain't saying nothing. 

Brer Rabbit, he allow, says he, "It's the fatal truth, all this that I'm a-telling you. The doctor, he flewed round till he fetch my old woman to, and then he say there ain't no needs to be skittish on accounts of my having a double gizzard, 'cause all I had to do was to be kind of careful with my chewings and gnawings, and my comings and goings. He say that I'd have to suffer with it till I find the gizzard-eater. I ask him whereabouts is he, and he say that I'd know him when I seed him, and if I fail to know him, he'll make hisself beknown to me. This kind of irritate me, 'cause when a man's a doctor, and is got the idea of curing anybody, there ain't no needs to deal in no riddles. But he say that it ain't no use for to tell all you know, specially 'fore dinner."

Brer Alligator went a-sliding long through the water; he listen and smack his mouth, but he ain't saying nothing. 

Brer Rabbit, he talk on; he allow, says he, "And there was one thing he told me more plainer than all the rest. He say that when anybody was afflicted with the double gizzard, they dares not cross water with it, 'cause if there's anything that a double gizzard won't stand it's the smell of water."

Brer Alligator went slipping long through the water, but he feel like the time done come when he pleased to say something. He say, says he, "How come you are crossing water now, if the doctor tell you that?"

This make Brer Rabbit laugh; he allow, "Maybe I oughtn't to tell you, but 'fore I can cross water that double gizzard got to come out. The doctor done told me that if she ever smell water, they'll be such a swelling up that my skin won't hold me; and no longer than last night, 'fore I come to this creek—it was a creek then, whatsomever you may call it now—I took out my double gizzard and hid it in a hickory hollow. And if you are the gizzard-eater, now is your chance, 'cause if you put it off, you may rue the day. If you are in the notion, I'll take you right there and show you the stump where I hid it at—or if you want to be lonesome about it, I'll let you go by yourself and I'll stay right here."

Brer Alligator, he slip and slide through the water. He say, says he, "Where'd you say you'd stay?"

Brer Rabbit allow, says he, "I'll stay right here, Brer Gator, or anywhere's else you may choosen; I don't care much where I stays or what I does, so long as I get rid of that double gizzard what's been a-terrifying me. You better go by yourself, 'cause bad as that double gizzard is done me, I got a kind of tendersome feeling for it, and I'm feared if I was to go along with you, and see you grab it, they'd be some boo-hooing done. If you go by yourself, just rap on the stump and say—If you are ready, I'm ready and a little more so, and you won't have no trouble with her. She's hid right in them woods yonder, and the hollow hickory stump ain't so mighty far from where the bank of the creek ought to be."

Brer Gator ain't got much more sense than what it'd take for to climb a fence after somebody done pulled it down, and so he kind of slewed hisself around, and steered for the woods—the same woods where there's so many trees, and where old Sis Owl starts all the whirlwinds by fanning her wings. Brer Alligator swum and steered, till he come close to land, and when he done that Brer Rabbit make a big jump and land on solid ground. 

He might've got his feet wet, but if he did it was as much. He allow, says he—

You poor old Gator, if you knowed A from Izzard,

You'd know mighty well that I'd keep my Gizzard.

And with that, he was done gone—done clean gone!”

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C158. Baer (p. 145). Brother Rabbit and the Gizzard-Eater

This is Chase158.

Types ATU0091 monkey (cat) who left heart at home
Motifs
K0544  monkey (cat) who left heart at home
K0961.2 flesh (vital organs) alleged to be only cure for disease
Notes

For African version, Baer invotes letter Harris received in 1907 from Captain James H. Reeves, who provided Sulu version about alligator's wife, jealous of friendship between alligator and monkey, said she was dying and monkey heart was only cure. "The tale had been told by Hadji Butu, chief advisor to the Sultan of Sulu, who told the captain it had not been written down but was kept alive by the professional stortyellers and troubadors of the Moros."

Arewa has three versions with shark and monkey, and in two medicine is neede for sultan. Lambrecht has turtle needing a cure for his wife. Klipple has a blue monkey, and the heart is a cure for the fish's uncle.

Baer mentions the jataka in passing.

Conclusion: "The reputation as an "old legend" among the Mohammedan Moros and mention of the sultan in two African tales makes it likely that this tale entered the African tradition with the spread of Islam; however, in the intervening centuries it has settled in well with the African animal tale tradition and was probably brought to this country by slaves from Africa."

C158. Brother Rabbit and the Gizzard-eater (original spelling)

15. Brother Rabbit and the Gizzard-eater. Text Source: Told by Uncle Remus by Joel Chandler Harris. Online at Project Gutenberg. You can click here for the standardized spelling plus all notes to the story.

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“It seem like ter me dat I hear somebody say, not longer dan day ’fo’ yistiddy, dat dey’d be mighty glad ef dey could fin’ some un fer ter bet wid um,” said Uncle Remus, staring hard at the little boy, and then suddenly shutting his eyes tight, so that he might keep from laughing at the expression he saw on the child’s face. Receiving no immediate response to his remark, the old man opened his eyes again, and found the little boy regarding him with a puzzled air.



“My mother says it is wrong to bet,” said the child after awhile. He was quite serious, and it was just this aspect of seriousness that made him a little different from another little boy that had been raised at Uncle Remus’s knee. “Mother says that no Christian would want to bet.”

The old man closed his eyes again, as though[244] trying to remember something. He frowned and smacked his mouth before he spoke, “It look like dat I never is ter git de tas’e er dat chicken-pie what yo’ gran’ma sont me out’n my mouf. I dunner when I been had any chicken-pie what stayed wid me like dat chicken-pie. But ’bout dat bettin’,” he remarked, straightening himself in his chair, “I speck I mus’ ’a’ been a-dreamin’. I know mighty well it couldn’t ’a’ been you; so we’ll des up an’ say it wuz little Dreamus, an’ let it go at dat. All I know is dat dey wuz a little chap loungin’ roun’ here tryin’ fer ter l’arn how ter play mumbly-peg wid one er de case-knives what he tuck fum de white folks’ dinner-table, an’ whiles he wuz in de middle er his l’arnin’, de ol’ speckled hen run fum under de house here, an’ sot up a mighty cacklin’, kaze she fear’d some un wuz gwineter interrupt de eggs what she been nussin’ an’ warmin’ up. She cackle, an’ she cackle, an’ den she cackle some mo’ fer ter keep fum fergittin’ how; an’ ’long ’bout dat time, dish yer little boy what I been tellin’ you ’bout—I speck we’ll be bleeze ter call him Dreamus—he[245] up wid a rock an’ flung it right at ’er, an’ ef she’d ’a’ been in de way er de rock, he’d ’a’ come mighty nigh hittin’ her. Dis make de ol’ hen bofe skeer’d an’ fear’d an’ likewise mad, an’ she hitched a squall on ter her cackle, an’ flop her wings. Seein’ dat de hen wuz mad, dis little chap, which he name Dreamus, he got mad, too, an’ he ’lowed, ‘I bet you I make you hush!’ an’ dar dey had it, de ol’ hen runnin’ an’ squallin’, an’ de little chap zoonin’ rocks at her. I speck de hen would ’a’ bet ef she’d ’a’ know’d how—an’ she sho’ would ’a’ won de bet, kaze de las’ news I hear fum ’er she wuz runnin’ an’ squallin’.”

The little boy squirmed uneasily in his chair. He remembered the incident very well, so well that he hardly knew what to say. But after a while, thinking that it was both necessary and polite to say something, he declared that when he made that remark to the hen he knew she wouldn’t understand him, and that what he said about betting was just a saying.

“Dat mought be, honey,” said Uncle Remus, “but don’t you fool yo’se’f ’bout dat hen not[246] knowin’ how ter talk, kaze dey has been times an’ places when de creeturs kin do lots mo’ talkin’ dan folks. When you git ter be ol’ ez what I is, you’ll know dat talkin’ ain’t got nothin’ in de roun’ worl’ ter do wid fedders, an’ needer wid fur. I hear you say you want ter bet wid de ol’ hen, an’ ef you still wantin’ you got a mighty good chance dis day ef de sun is mighty nigh down. I’ll bet you a thrip ag’in a ginger-cake dat when you had yo’ dinner you ain’t fin’ no chicken gizzard in yo’ part er de pie.”

“No,” replied the child, “I didn’t, and when I asked grandmother about it, she said she was going to raise some chickens next year with double gizzards.”

“Did she say dat? Did Miss Sally say dat?” inquired Uncle Remus, laughing delightedly. “Well, suh, dat sho’ do bang my time! How come she ter know dat some er de creeturs got double gizzards? She sho’ is de outdoin’est white ’oman what’s yever been bornded inter de worl’. She done sont me de chicken gizzard des so I kin tell you ’bout de double gizzards an’ de what-nots.[247] Double gizzards! De ve’y name flings me ’way back yander ter ol’ folks an’ ol’ times. Laws-a-massy! I wonder what Miss Sally gwine do nex’; anybody what guess it oughter be president by good rights.” Uncle Remus paused, and lowered his voice to a confidential tone—“She ain’t tell you ’bout de time when de Yallergater wuz honin’ fer ol’ Brer Rabbit’s double gizzards, is she, honey?”

“No, she didn’t tell me that, but she laughed, and when I asked her what she was laughing at, she said I’d find out by the time I was seven feet tall.”

“You hear dat, don’t you?” Uncle Remus spoke as though there were a third person in the room. “What I been tellin’ you all dis time?” and then he laughed as though this third person were laughing with him. “You may try, an’ you may fly, but you never is ter see de beat er Miss Sally.”

“Was grandmother talking about a tale, Uncle Remus? It must have been a very funny one, for she laughed until she had to take off her spectacles and wipe them dry,” said the little boy.

[248]

“Dat’s her! dat’s Miss Sally up an’ down, an’ dey can’t nobody git ahead er her. She know’d mighty well dat time you say sump’n ’bout double gizzards my min’ would fly right back ter de time when de Yalligater wuz dribblin’ at de mouf, an’ ol’ Brer Rabbit wuz shaking in his shoes.”

“If it’s a long story, I’m afraid you haven’t time to tell it now,” suggested the little boy.

The child was so polite that the old negro stood somewhat in awe of him, and he was afraid, too, that it was ominous of some misfortune—there was something uncanny about it from Uncle Remus’s point of view. “Bless you, honey! I got des ez much time ez what dey is—it all b’longs ter me an’ you. Maybe you wanter go some’rs else; maybe you’ll wait twel some yuther day fer de platted whip dat I hear you talkin’ ’bout.”

“No; I’ll wait and get the story and the whip together—if you are not too tired.”

The old negro looked at the little boy from the corner of his eye to see if he was really in earnest.[249] Satisfying himself on that score, he promptly began to plait the whip while he unraveled the story. He seemed to be more serious than usual, but one of the peculiarities of Uncle Remus, as many a child had discovered, was that he was not to be judged by any outward aspect. This is the way he began:

“Ever since I been pirootin’ roun’ in deze low-groun’s, it’s been de talk er dem what know’d dat Brer Rabbit wuz a mighty man at a frolic. I don’t speck he’d show up much in deze days, but in de times when de creeturs wuz bossin’ dey own jobs, Brer Rabbit wuz up fer perty nigh ev’ything dat wuz gwine on ef dey want too much work in it. Dey couldn’t be a dance er a quiltin’ nowhar’s aroun’ but what he’d be dar; he wuz fust ter come an’ last ter go.


“He holla’d fer de man what run de ferry”

“Well, dey wuz one time when he went too fur an’ stayed too late, bekaze a big rain come endurin’ de time when dey wuz playin’ an’ dancin’, an’ when Brer Rabbit put out fer home, he foun’ dat a big freshet done come an’ gone. De dreens had got ter be creeks, de creeks had got ter be[250] rivers, an’ de rivers—well, I ain’t gwine ter tell you what de rivers wuz kaze you’d think dat I done tol’ de trufe good-bye. By makin’ big jumps an’ gwine out er his way, Brer Rabbit manage fer ter git ez close ter home ez de creek, but when he git dar, de creek wuz so wide dat it make him feel like he been los’ so long dat his fambly done fergot him. Many an’ many a time had he cross’ dat creek on a log, but de log done gone, an’ de water wuz spread out all over creation. De water wuz wide, but dat wa’n’t mo’ dan half—it look like it wuz de wettest water dat Brer Rabbit ever lay eyes on.


“Dar wuz ol’ Brer B’ar settin’ at de foot er de tree”

“Dey wuz a ferry dar fer times like dis, but it look like it wuz a bigger fresh dan what dey had counted on. Brer Rabbit, he sot on de bank an’ wipe de damp out’n his face an’ eyes, an’ den he[251] holla’d fer de man what run de ferry. He holla’d an’ holla’d, an’ bimeby, he hear some un answer him, an’ he looked a little closer, an’ dar wuz de man, which his name wuz Jerry, way up in de top lim’s uv a tree; an’ he looked still closer, an’ he seed dat Jerry had company, kaze dar wuz ol’ Brer B’ar settin’ at de foot er de tree, waitin’ fer Jerry fer ter come down so he kin tell ’im howdy.” Uncle Remus paused to see what effect this statement would have on the little boy. The youngster said nothing, but his shrewd smile showed the old man that he fully appreciated the reason why Jerry[252] was in no hurry to shake hands with Brother Bear.

“Well, suh, Brer Rabbit took notice dat dey wuz sump’n mo’ dan dampness ’twix’ um, an he start in ter holla again, an’ he holla’d so loud, an’ he holla’d so long, dat he woke up ol’ Brer Yalligater. Now, it ain’t make ol’ Brer Yalligater feel good fer ter be wokened up at dat hour, kaze he’d des had a nice supper er pine-knots an’ sweet ’taters, an’ he wuz layin’ out at full lenk on his mud bed. He ’low ter hisse’f, he did, ‘Who in de nation is dis tryin’ fer ter holla de bottom out er de creek?’ He lissen, an’ den he turn over an’ lissen ag’in. He shot one eye, an’ den he shot de yuther one, but dey ain’t no sleepin’ in dat neighberhood. Jerry in de tree, he holla back, ‘Can’t come—got comp’ny!’

“Brer Yalligater, he hear dis, an’ he say ter hisse’f dat ef nobody can’t come, he kin, an’ he riz ter de top wid no mo’ fuss dan a fedder-bed makes when you let it ’lone. He riz, he did, an’ his two eyes look des perzackly like two bullets floatin’ on de water. He riz an’ wunk his eye, an’[253] ax Brer Rabbit howdy, an’ mo’ speshually how is his daughter. Brer Rabbit, he say dat dey ain’t no tellin’ how his daughter is, kaze when he lef’ home her head wuz a-swellin’. He say dat some er de neighbors’ chillun come by an’ flung rocks at her an’ one un um hit her on top er de head right whar de cow-lick is, an’ he hatter run atter de doctor.


“He riz an’ wunk his eye, an’ ax Brer Rabbit howdy”

“Brer Yalligater ’low, ‘You don’t tell me, Brer Rabbit, dat it’s come ter dis! Yo’ chillun gittin’ chunked by yo’ neighbors’ chillun! Well, well, well! I wish you’d tell me wharbouts it’s all a-gwine ter een’ at. Why, it’ll git so atter while dat dey ain’t no peace anywhar’s ’ceppin at my house in de bed er de creek.’

[254]

“Brer Rabbit say, ‘Ain’t it de trufe? An’ not only does Brer Fox chillun chunk my chillun on dey cow-licks, but no sooner is I gone atter de doctor dan here come de creek a-risin’. I may be wrong, but I ain’t skeer’d ter say dat it beats anything I yever is lay eyes on. Over yander in de fur woods is what my daughter is layin’ wid de headache, an’ here’s her pa, an’ ’twix’ us is de b’ilin’ creek. Ef I wuz ter try ter wade, ten ter one de water would be over my head, an’ ef not dat bad, all de pills what de doctor gi’ me would melt in my pocket. An’ dey might pizen me, kaze de doctor ain’t say dey wuz ter be tuck outside.’


“‘Ef you think you kin stay in one place long enough, I’ll try ter put you ’cross de creek’”

“Ol’ Brer Yalligater float on de water like he[255] ain’t weigh no mo’ dan one er deze yer postitch stomps, an’ he try ter drop a tear. He groan, he did, an’ float backerds an’ forrerds like a tired canoe. He say, ‘Brer Rabbit, ef dey yever wuz a rover you is one. Up you come an’ off you go, an’ dey ain’t no mo’ keepin’ up wid you dan ef you had wings. Ef you think you kin stay in one place long enough, I’ll try ter put you ’cross de creek. Brer Rabbit kinder rub his chin whiles he wiggle his nose. He ’low, sezee, ‘Brer ’Gater, how deep is dat water what you floatin’ in?’ Brer Yalligater say, sezee, ‘Brer Rabbit, ef me an’ my ol’ ’oman wuz ter jine heads, an’ I wuz ter stan’ on de tip-een’ my tail, dey’ll still be room enough fer all er my chillun ’fo’ we totch bottom.’

“Brer Rabbit, he fell back like he gwineter faint. He ’low, ‘Brer ’Gater, you don’t tell me! You sholy don’t mean dem last words! Why, you make me feel like I’m furder fum home and dem what’s done lost fer good! How de name er goodness you gwineter put me ’cross dis slippery water?’ Brer Yalligater, he blow a bubble or two out’n his nose, an’ den he say, sezee, ‘Ef you kin[256] stay still in one place long ’nough, I’m gwineter take you ’cross on my back. You nee’nter say thanky, yit I want you ter know dat I ain’t eve’ybody’s water-hoss.’ Brer Rabbit he ’low, sezee, ‘I kin well b’lieve dat, Brer ’Gater, but somehow, I kinder got a notion dat yo’ tail mighty limber. I hear ol’ folks say dat you kin knock a chip fum de back er yo’ head wid de tip-een’ er yo’ tail an’ never haf try.’ Brer Yalligater smack his mouf, an’ say, sezee, ‘Limber my tail may be, Brer Rabbit, an’ fur-reachin’, but don’t blame me. It wuz dat a-way when it wuz ’gun ter me. It’s all j’inted up ’cordin’ ter natur.’

“Brer Rabbit, he study an’ study, an’ de mo’ he study, de wuss he like it. But he bleeze ter go home—dey wa’n’t no two ways ’bout dat—an’ he ’low, sezee, ‘I speck what you say is some’rs in de neighborhoods er de trufe, Brer ’Gater, an’ mo’ dan dat, I b’lieve I’ll go ’long wid you. Ef you’ll ride up a leetle closer, I’ll make up my mind so I won’t keep you waitin’.’ Brer Yalligater, he float by de side er de bank same ez a cork out’n a pickle bottle. He ain’t do like he[257] in a hurry, kaze he drapt a word er two about de wedder, an’ he say dat de water wuz mighty col’ down dar in de slushes. But Brer Rabbit tuck notice dat when he smole one er his smiles, he show’d up a double row er tushes, dat look like dey’d do mighty good work in a saw-mill. Brer Rabbit, he ’gun ter shake like he havin’ a chill; he ’low, ‘I feel dat damp, Brer ’Gater, dat I mought des ez well be in water up ter my chin!’ Brer Yalligater ain’t say nothin’, but he can’t hide his tushes. Brer Rabbit look up, he look down, an’ he look all aroun’. He ain’t skacely know what ter do. He ’low, ‘Brer ’Gater, yo’ back mighty roughnin’; how I gwine ter ride on it?’ Brer Yalligater say, sezee, ‘De roughnin’ will he’p you ter hol’ on, kaze you’ll hatter ride straddle. You kin des fit yo’ foots on de bumps an’ kinder brace yo’se’f when you think you see a log floatin’ at us. You kin des set up dar same ez ef you wuz settin’ at home in yo’ rockin’-cheer.


“‘Brer ’Gater, ef I ain’t mighty much mistooken, you ain’t headin’ fer de lan’in’’”

“Brer Rabbit shuck his head, but he got on, he did, an’ he ain’t no sooner git on dan he wish mighty hard he wuz off. Brer Yalligater say,[258] sezee. ‘You kin pant ef you wanter, Brer Rabbit, but I’ll do de paddlin’,’ an’ den he slip thoo de water des like he greased. Brer Rabbit sho’ wuz skeer’d but he keep his eye open, an’ bimeby he tuck notice dat Brer Yalligater wa’n’t makin’ fer de place whar de lan’in’s at, an’ he up an’ sesso. He ’low, ‘Brer ’Gater, ef I ain’t mighty much mistooken, you ain’t headin’ fer de lan’in’.’ Brer Yalligater say, sezee, ‘You sho’ is got mighty good eyes, Brer Rabbit. I been waitin’ fer you a long time, an’ I’m de wust kinder waiter. I most know you ain’t ferget dat day in de stubble, when you say you gwineter show me ol’ man Trouble. Well, you ain’t only show ’im ter me, but you made me shake han’s wid ’im. You sot de dry[259] grass afire, an’ burn me scandalious. Dat de reason my back so rough, an’ dat de reason my hide so tough. Well, I been a-waitin’ sence dat time, an’ now here you is. You burn me twel I hatter squench de burnin’ in de big quagmire.’

“Brer Yalligater laugh, but he had de laugh all on his side, kaze dat wuz one er de times when Brer Rabbit ain’t feel like gigglin’. He sot dar a-shakin’ an’ a-shiverin’. Bimeby he ’low, sezee, ‘What you gwine do, Brer ’Gater?’ Brer Yalligater, say, sezee, ‘It look like ter me dat sence you sot de dry grass afire, I been havin’ symptoms. Dat what de doctor say. He look at my tongue, an’ feel er my pulsh, an’ shake his head. He say dat bein’s he’s my frien’, he don’t mind tellin’ me dat my symptoms is gittin’ mo’ wusser dan what dey been, an’ ef I don’t take sump’n I’ll be failin’ inter one deze yer inclines what make folks flabby an’ weak.’

“Brer Rabbit, he shuck an’ he shiver’d. He ’low, sezee, ‘What else de doctor say, Brer ’Gater?’ Brer Yalligater keep on a-slippin’ along; he say, sezee, ‘De doctor ain’t only look at my[260] tongue—he medjer’d my breff, an’ he hit me on my bosom—tip-tap-tap!—an’ he say dey ain’t but one thing dat’ll kyo me. I ax ’im what dat is, an’ he say it’s Rabbit gizzard.’ Brer Yalligater slip an’ slide along, an’ wait fer ter see what Brer Rabbit gwineter say ter dat. He ain’t had ter wait long, kaze Brer Rabbit done his thinkin’ like one er deze yer machines what got lightnin’ in it. He ’low, sezee, ‘It’s a mighty good thing you struck up wid me dis day, Brer ’Gater, kaze I got des perzackly de kinder physic what you lookin’ fer. All de neighbors say I’m mighty quare an’ I speck I is, but quare er not quare, I’m long been lookin’ fer de gizzard-eater.’

“Brer Yalligater ain’t say nothin’; he des slide thoo de water, an’ lissen ter what Brer Rabbit sayin’. Brer Rabbit ’low, sezee, ‘De las’ time I wuz tooken sick, de doctor come in a hurry, an’ he sot up wid me all night—not a wink er sleep did dat man git. He say he kin tell by de way I wuz gwine on, rollin’ an’ tossin’, an’ moanin’ an’ groanin’, dat dey wa’n’t no physic gwineter do me no good. I ain’t never see no doctor scratch[261] his head like dat doctor did; he done like he wuz stumped, he sho’ did. He say he ain’t never see nobody wid my kind er trouble, an’ he went off an’ call in one er his brer doctors, an’ de two knock dey heads tergedder, an’ say my trouble all come fum havin’ a double gizzard. When my ol’ ’oman hear dat, she des flung her apron over her head, an’ fell back in a dead faint, an’ a little mo’ an’ I’d ’a’ had ter pay a doctor bill on her accounts. When she squalled, some er my chillun got skeer’d an’ tuck ter de woods, an’ dey ain’t all got back when I lef’ home las’ night.’

“Brer Yalligater, he des went a-slippin’ long thoo de water; he lissen, but he ain’t sayin’ nothin’. Brer Rabbit, he ’low, sezee, ‘It’s de fatal trufe, all dis dat I’m a-tellin’ you. De doctor, he flew’d roun’ twel he fotch my ol’ ’oman to, an’ den he say dey ain’t no needs ter be skittish on accounts er my havin’ a double gizzard, kaze all I had ter do wuz ter be kinder keerful wid my chawin’s an’ gnyawin’s, an’ my comin’s an’ gwines. He say dat I’d hatter suffer wid it twel I fin’ de gizzard-eater. I ax ’im whar[262] bouts is he, an’ he say dat I’d know him when I seed him, an’ ef I fail ter know ’im, he’ll make hisse’f beknown ter me. Dis kinder errytate me, kaze when a man’s a doctor, an’ is got de idee er kyoin’ anybody, dey ain’t no needs ter deal in no riddles. But he say dat tain’t no use fer ter tell all you know, speshually fo’ dinner.’

“Brer Yalligater went a-slidin’ long thoo de water; he lissen an’ smack his mouf, but he ain’t sayin’ nothin’. Brer Rabbit, he talk on; he ’low, sezee, ‘An dey wuz one thing he tol’ me mo’ plainer dan all de rest. He say dat when anybody wuz ’flicted wid de double gizzard, dey dassent cross water wid it, kaze ef dey’s anything dat a double gizzard won’t stan’ it’s de smell er water.’

“Brer Yalligater went slippin’ long thoo de water, but he feel like de time done come when he bleeze ter say sump’n. He say, sezee, ‘How come youer crossin’ water now, ef de doctor tell you dat?’ Dis make Brer Rabbit laugh; he ’low, ‘Maybe I oughtn’t ter tell you, but fo’ I kin cross water dat double gizzard got ter come out.[263] De doctor done tol’ me dat ef she ever smell water, dey’ll be sech a swellin’ up dat my skin won’t hol’ me; an’ no longer dan’ las’ night, ’fo’ I come ter dis creek—’twuz a creek den, whatsomever you may call it now—I tuck out my double gizzard an’ hid it in a hick’ry holler. An’ ef youer de gizzard-eater, now is yo’ chance, kaze ef you put it off, you may rue de day. Ef youer in de notion I’ll take you right dar an’ show you de stump whar I hid it at—er ef you wanter be lonesome ’bout it, I’ll let you go by yo’se’f an’ I’ll stay right here.’

“Brer Yalligater, he slip an’ slide thoo de water. He say, sezee, ‘Whar’d you say you’d stay?’ Brer Rabbit ’low, sezee, ‘I’ll stay right here, Brer ’Gater, er anywhar’s else you may choosen; I don’t keer much whar I stays er what I does, so long ez I get rid er dat double gizzard what’s been a-tarrifyin’ me. You better go by yo’se’f, kaze bad ez dat double gizzard is done me, I got a kinder tendersome feelin’ fer it, an’ I’m fear’d ef I wuz ter go ’long wid you, an’ see you grab it, dey’d be some boo-hooin’ done. Ef[264] you go by yo’se’f, des rap on de stump an’ say—Ef youer ready, I’m ready an’ a little mo’ so, un’ you won’t have no trouble wid her. She’s hid right in dem woods yander, an’ de holler hick’ry stump ain’t so mighty fur fum whar de bank er de creek oughter be.’


“Brer Rabbit make a big jump an’ lan’ on solid ground”

“Brer ’Gater ain’t got much mo’ sense dan what it ’ud take fer ter clim’ a fence atter somebody done pulled it down, an’ so he kinder slew’d hisse’f aroun’, an’ steered fer de woods—de same woods whar dey’s so many trees, an’ whar ol’ Sis Owl starts all de whirl-win’s by fannin’ her wings. Brer Yalligater swum an’ steered, twel he come close ter lan’, an’ when he done dat[265] Brer Rabbit make a big jump an’ lan’ on solid ground. He mought er got his feet wet, but ef he did ’twuz ez much. He ’low, sezee—

“‘You po’ ol’ ’Gater, ef you know’d A fum Izzard,
You’d know mighty well dat I’d keep my Gizzard.’
An’ wid dat, he wuz done gone—done clean gone!”